I really don't know how much the family is endeared to this idea. I've learned that (of course) it's all about me and I do this because I love it and it gives me time to pause and think of events throughout the year.
I lost Pat this last year and the play "Wicked" is seared in my heart as "ours". So when the time came to pick my song, gather pictures and begin the movie-making process, I went to iTunes and found the song Defying Gravity and began my project.
I try very hard to find the part of the song that I want to "underline" in my creations, and this time I landed on the lyrics:
If I'm flying solo at least I'm flying free.
I don't know if this statement "fits" with the rest of the family, but it sent a beacon to me. And I followed.
On August 19, 1984 I became a mother. And I have never looked back. I haven't been one to give "worldly" gifts to my kids. Nor, have they been raised to give much credence to the trappings of living a lifestyle that invokes power and wealth. From the beginning of time, they were raised to respect the people that surround them and to spend their energy and finances to help those in need.
My children were taught to be independent.
As I grow older, I question what the crap I was thinking.
I should have raised children that would never leave my side. They should be needy and dig their claws in while they cling to me with desperation.
Sigh. They're not.
Because of their strengths, I'm learning to stand alone. I'm learning to dig inside for confidence and self-worth; to pull out my own strengths and leave my weaknesses sitting on the sidewalk unnurtured.
Buddha said:
"You yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection."
I'm learning to fly solo. And it's not so bad.