This year has brought many, many, MANY changes for my son. He is a daddy now. He loves it. It's so fun to watch him embrace daddy-hood.
Goose is no longer with the Hotshots. He decided that being gone the entire Summer is not what he had in mind for his family. He was offered a job that ensured he would be home every night. He accepted. Goose is over quite a few fire agencies now and will make sure fires are fought and battles won.
I think his decision shared excitement and anticipation with sadness. As "the season" approaches I think he feels relief at not leaving his family, but yet is saddened to not be with his "brother-family". I get it. However, I'm SUPER excited to have him home to enjoy birthdays, family barbecues and hot tubbing.
It's funny how you break routine without thinking about it. In hindsight, it was the best thing ever. But why? Interesting.
I needed a bath. I learned a long time ago that if I check voicemail or email that "POOF" - my day is gone before I know it. Therefore, anything I needed for myself came first NO MATTER WHAT.
Except THAT day.
I was getting ready to run a tub. Jaden was a little guy and still in bed.
I checked my messages.
"This is Officer so-and-so. Your son has been in an accident. You need to call the hospital."
What? Did I hear that right?
I knew it would be faster to drive to the hospital.
Josh was living with us. I yelled down the stairs that one of the boys was hurt. I was heading to the hospital. "You've got Jaden."
I didn't even wait for an answer.
I got in the jeep and took off.
I SWEAR TO YOU that was the loooooongest drive in FOREVER.
In reality it was MAYBE five minutes.
Was Tyson in a wreck on his way to work? What had happened to him?
I got to the hospital.
"My son is here. I need to get to him."
"What's his name?"
"I don't know."
The nurse looked at me quizzically.
"Last name is Deason, but I don't know for sure if it's Tyson or Kadell."
The nurse led me to a room with Goose sitting in a bed.
"Goose." I whispered.
They were wheeling out an X-ray machine and I heard the doctor say "Nothing is broke."
It's funny how unimportant things bear witness to what is REALLY happening.
Goose had his hand on towels. ALOT of towels.
I said to him "At least nothing is broke."
I had no idea what had happened. Why was he there? He looked fine. Why was he there? Why did a cop call me? Why was he there? Why was he NOT in X-ray? Why did they wheel in a machine? Why was he there?
Then my little boy lifted his hand off the towels. His flesh hung down. I could see his bones, tendons and all the gunk that make up a hand.
I reeled out of the room and sat on the floor outside of his door - head between my knees - fighting nausea and the blackness creeping. I heard Goose say loudly "DO NOT CRY MOM."
I didn't.
I stood up. Brushed my butt and headed back in.
Long story short? While employed at Powder River making livestock fencing, Goose had rolled his arm in the machine that bends metal. It popped his hand. I knew beyond any belief that we were going to lose his hand.
After transferring to a different hospital and sitting FOREVER in the ER watching nurses come in to drug him and wash his wounds, the surgeon came in. He did a few tests and announced "I can save his hand."
I couldn't believe it. Guess what? After multiple surgeries and a very long hospital stay, he SAVED HIS HAND.
Through all of that trauma, Goose kept a cool head and a steady soul. He kept ME calm while he suffered and bled.
In 1987, Sammy Hagar released the song "Eagles Fly". First of all, I love, love, LOVE Sammy. Second of all, this song has ALWAYS reminded me of Goose. Always.
Sunday morning 9 a.m.
I saw fire in the sky
I felt my heart pound in my chest
I heard an eagle cry
Now I'm alive I can breathe the air
I watch an eagle rise above the trees
Project myself into what he sees
Take me away
Come on fly away
Take me up so high
Where eagles fly
I often dream I sail through the sky
I've always wished I could fly
The simple life of a bird on the wing
Oh Lord, I could sing
I'm alive, I breathe the air
Wash the earth from my face
I catch a glimpse of another dream
I turn, I look but there's no trace
Come on, let's fly away where eagles fly.
Goose will soar through 32. He will keep steady and will surely win this race called Life. If you haven't had a chance to soar among the Eagles, meet my guy. I get to do it EVERY single day.
Happy birthday, my son. I'm so very proud of you.
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